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Finding Joy

Posted by benbeatscancer@gmail.com on July 14, 2020 at 2:45 PM

Ben's brother is coming over today. Ben has been resisting visitors because he hasn't felt his best. He's felt tired. He likes it when he's at his best. When he's energetic and able. 


Well, I think things have changed now, I say. I think we need to open the doors to your mom and family for any day they like. They don't care if you need to sleep. And what else for joy? I ask. 


I'd really like to get that new green house built. He starts and I smile. Same old Ben. His joy is in building, making, working. 


I listen for a while, then gently say, I think you need to consider something less physical. I think we need to find a way to wheel you out to the garden where you can pick peas off the vines and thin carrots. You can prune tomotoes and worry about bugs on leaves. Maybe not building. 


He considers this for a long while and slowly starts to realize. That is the joy he will find and feel. You just won't be building this summer. He agrees, but we both want to save the lumber. The lumber for his projects... grow boxes, greenhouses, soil sifting. Probably he can build them all next summer. After this leg of the journey. We know it makes no sense, but we like the lumber sitting there, ready. 



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